so i came to this realization before my angry/bitter/other extreme emotions today, so i thought it would be a good thing to talk about.
i've figured out that i completely base my feelings around a situation, and when it comes down to it, other people. i've been asked "well what do YOU want" and i truly cannot answer that question the way they want it answered. i cannot separate my feelings from reality and decide what i would want in a perfect world. but we do not live in a perfect world, so what does it really matter? is it really sacrificing my own feelings just because my feelings depend on the situation?
i think it makes sense. you'll have to forgive my lame metaphor because i don't have the energy to think of anything better. say you liked pizza with pepperoni on top. and someone offers you pizza with pepperoni and anchovies because hey, there's still pepperoni on it, so you should like it right? no... it's completely different because now there is something new added on that you cannot even compare the two.
anyway, i better stop. in my mind this was going to sound a lot more intelligent but i'm a little out of it today so you can all just deal with my ramblings.
p.s. college = usc
=]
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